The Pantaloon : Abbot And His Costellos : Brother Wagwit

The Pantaloon
Edited by Brother Wagwit
Earlyish in the 21st Century

Abbott And His Costellos

After poisoning and jailing Navalny because he wouldn’t stay on message, Vladimir has a face-lift session that goes awry. Botox seeps into his brain turning him messianic. He then invades Ukraine to make reparations for past grievances. The Russian army kills thousands of Ukrainians while sustaining thousands of battlefield deaths of their own. Since Vladimir is a cipher, we may never really know the extent of the chip on his shoulder. Regardless, Vladimir is either a moron, senile, or loony. Of course, he’s also a Russian plant.

A few weeks into the fray, and again recently, Kissinger (yep, that one, still alive) said that Ukraine should relinquish the territories that Russia wants. Kissinger is either a moron, senile, loony, or a Russian plant. Or all four. Probably has been since the Nixon days.

Meanwhile, in Uvalde, Texas, an 18-year old is having a bad day, and to make reparations for whatever grievances, he takes a couple of guns into a school where he shoots and kills children and teachers. Of course, the shooter himself is killed, just like the Russian army conscripts. And as with Vladimir, we will never find out what the grievances were.

A few hours after the incident, Abbott and his Costellos show up in Uvalde for the obligatory show of unity and sympathy, offering a few perfunctory remarks that fall flat. Beto then makes a few pointed statements about Abbott and his Costellos. Some of the Costellos are overheard calling Beto an asshole.

So in a fraction of a news-cycle, the bad guy is now Beto. Not the shooter; not the extremism and ignorance foisted on Texas by Abbott and his Costellos; not the Uvalde police who, uhhh, were there, but not really there; and not anyone else. No, Beto is the perp because he won’t stay on message.

So as with Vladimir and Kissinger, it follows that Abbott and his Costellos are either morons, senile (they’re old enough for early onset dementia), loonies, or Russian plants. I’m going with all four.

You can lie down with dogs and get fleas, but you gotta stay on message.